Fish Anyone??

Most people that know me, know that I have made several mistakes. However, lately I seem to keep making the same one over and over, thinking its the right thing to do. Now, I'm here going over my motives and I am starting to see a pattern...one I don't like. Some have called what I do, people-pleasing...enabling, rescuing, etc. It wasn't until yesterday, I was reading this prayer (which I do daily) from a Pastor back east, and this prayer was actually getting my attention. I mean, they all do, but this really seemed to scream "HEY BARBARA...THIS IS FOR YOU! It was about growing weary in relationships where it's one sided and how we need a drama free zone. So, I asked where is the cut off between giving and over giving. He answered, when you are like a revolving door ... that's always going out. He then went on to say that some people want the fish without the responsibilities of doing the fishing and that we don't teach them how. Wow. Let me go back in time, just a couple of decades. This is while I was still in my teens...on my own with what would turn out to be my sons father, Kent (God rest his soul). I was 17, a rebel with long brown hair, who couldn't take one more day of living with my mom and my stepfather, who mom met the very day he got out of prison. Well, Kent and I were in love so when he moved from Georgia to North Carolina...and asked me if I wanted to go, I said YES! We were living in a trailer in the back woods. He was a very talented house painter, but for the first few months, we had no food. He did what he could with odd jobs..the man could fix anything...and I finally got a job as a cocktail waitress (I know...but they didn't ask for my ID, this is before I knew the Lord people)...and it would be weeks before I got paid...all tips went for rent and utilities. Kent came home and grabbed some poles and looked at me and asked if I'd ever fish? Well, sort of, I mean, mom and dad took us as kids to a park one time...but I never actually touched a fish. He said "Well, we have got to get some food cause I'm hungry and you are 90 pounds now!". Down the curvy country road we go..till he finds a spot, the spot. It took quite a while for him to show me, let alone me to do it, but I got that cricket on that hook. And Kent told me the cricket still needs to be moving because that attracts the fish. I dont know how many crickets I killed. He spent so much time showing me how to fish and then how to gut the fish, and then how to cook those fish. Within a week, I was catching as much fish as he was. Now, I could go on with how big mine were, etc. but you wouldn't believe me if I told you (especially that 5 pound big mouth bass, that once we got it in the boat we found, I was screaming to get it out!)...sorry, couldn't let that one not be included. We really and I mean really lived by the rule of if we didn't catch any fish, we didn't eat. Believe me, there were a couple of times we didn't catch any. Some of my fondest memories were of those years of fishing in the woods, Clayton was a rollie, pollie round blonde headed baby boy and we fished and one time while he was barely able to sit up, he rolled down that small hill, into the water and I never saw a man move that fast in my life. Kent had Clayton hanging from his arm in a split second. We laughed so hard and dried up our baby with love. Keep in mind, by the time Clay was born, we were in a brand new house on Impress Drive, up on a hill with new vehicles, etc. Now, as I sit here rethinking those fishing days, it comes to me how I have deprived people of precious memories they could be telling in their 50's. So, Lord help me really, really pray for wisdom, especially when it comes to my baby sisters, the strength to say no in love, when it really is not helping them. By the way, yesterday was the best day and ended with me watching an angel baby for 7 hours. Love you Haily! Now, get out there and fish! You'll love it!